45 Comments
Jul 20Liked by Danusia Malina-Derben

I 100% support this type of self-care!!! This is one of my favorite posts this weekend. The most UNLIKELY tip ever, yet so worthwhile.

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I love you all the more. Just saying.

I'm happy you get this habit Kristi.

Sending love xo

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Jul 23Liked by Danusia Malina-Derben

Agreed! Made me Happy to read

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Jul 21Liked by Danusia Malina-Derben

Don’t tell anyone, but… my daughter crocheted a whale for my birthday a while back, and I love giving the whale a quick squeeze when I get home from work. He makes me laugh

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My lips are sealed Tim. A quick squeeze, here and there...delightful!

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Jul 20Liked by Danusia Malina-Derben

Haha this was such a terrific read!! Love how not only you break the stigma around teddy bears, but even more so around WHAT qualifies as self care. The greatest self care, I find, is in the everyday snippets and not in some extravagant face mask, bath, or even girls trip (?!)

Thank you for sharing your vulnerable testimony too of how the teddy helped you handle grief 🙏🏼 whatever works is the best remedy isn’t it 💖 when I first read it I instantly thought of the teddy that Elizabeth Gilbert brings with her when she’s on tour…. For comfort! xx

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Thanks so much Elin. I'm thrilled you love this one.

Ordinary acts are often the revolutionary ones. I wanted to bust open the idea that this is a woman's thing too...

You won't be surprised to know I'm receiving such a lovely lot of emails telling me about people's beloved cuddlies. YES, of course re Elizabeth Gilbert, thank you for reminding me of this.. In fact one of the emails this evening mentioned needing a teddy on the plane.

Thanks too for your restack - for getting this out to others! xx

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Jul 22Liked by Danusia Malina-Derben

Fully comfortable admitting I hug my 1984 Cabbage Patch Kid regularly! He was the most special thing in the world to me back then, so why would that feeling have gone away? Thanks for this lovely post!

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This. Swoon.

Ps. Your substack is great. Are your DM’s open as I want to ask you something?

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Jul 23Liked by Danusia Malina-Derben

Well me & Chickita, my stuffed chicken embraced this announcement like we do each other: with OPEN ARMS! 😍🐓💗

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YAY….I won’t lie, I’m yearning to see Chickita. 😘

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Jul 23Liked by Danusia Malina-Derben

I wish I could reply in the comments with a photo- but since I can't (AHEM- Substack Gods- get to it!!)

Scroll to the bottom of this- she's here!! 💛

https://kaylenalexandra.substack.com/p/divine-timing-and-toilets

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What a FAB article and oh Chickita…what a fine companion. I’m wincing at the word stuffed 🤣

🙏🏻for sharing your chick-pal xo

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Jul 23Liked by Danusia Malina-Derben

Thank you for asking about her and for initiating this entire practice!!

Can’t wait to read what you publish next with Chicky! 🐓 ♥️

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Jul 23Liked by Danusia Malina-Derben

I have considered getting a plushie animal for myself, but felt a bit akward about it. Now I might just do that I feel touch deprived after 10 years of single parenting and now ad they are teenagers one late teenager there isn’t much touch or hugging.

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I'm really sorry to hear that you're feeling touch deprived. Buying a plushie sounds like a wonderful idea - it could offer a lot of comfort and a sense of closeness. Pasha is a help to me!

I hope whatever you buy brings you much-needed warmth and a bit of joy. I'm here if you ever fancy someone to talk to. I get single parenting 💞

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Jul 23Liked by Danusia Malina-Derben

What a kind reply, Thank you!🙏🏻

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Jul 22Liked by Danusia Malina-Derben

I love this idea! I do have my original teddy bear (he’ll be pushing 50!) but he’s on the headboard, not in bed with me. I do usually have a 26kg dog snuggled up to me, though!! 🐕‍🦺🧸

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He’s close by, protecting you 🥰

Oh my goodness I’ve been trying to work out what breed of dog you have. Love to know!

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Jul 23Liked by Danusia Malina-Derben

She's a greyhound/labrador cross, I think (she's a rescue) - some people call them Greyadors :D

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Jul 21Liked by Danusia Malina-Derben

This article feels like a warm, plushy Teddy bear to read. I LOVE that it highlights a unique piece of the self-care picture. And, doesn't have a stuffed animal they love?!

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I'm happy this hit the plushy spot.

Who doesn't have a teddy somewhere, and if they say they don't, I'm not sure I believe 'em 😉

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Jul 20Liked by Danusia Malina-Derben

I love that secret that isn’t no more one ! Let me tell you I still have my « Nafnaf » that’s his name. It’s a pink rabbit that comes from my baby life and that is still in my personal belongings. For out fist year as a couple, 24 years ago, my hubby gifted me with a teddy bear. Last Christmas I offered 2 giant Teddy Bears to my kids who not those little kids they were. And they were so happy ! Offering a stuffed animal is the kindest gesture even to an adult. Cuddling them is so natural.

And congrats for the fifth year !!!

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It's good to share secrets that work ;)

Nafnaf sounds wonderful - you're right giving stuffed animals is one helluva loving gesture.

Thanks for the congrats for my milestone - who knew? I'm finding it a sustaining decision and am deeply thankful to have chosen it.

ps. one of things I'm loving is how many people are emailing me about their cuddlies. Isn't that great!!

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This is the second post in a row that mentioned grown-ups having teddy bears is on their healthy self-care list. I'd never heard of this one, and I fully approve.

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Lovely to hear from you! Which other piece mentions teddy bear self care? I’d love to read it.

What kind of self care buddy would you get yourself?! 😉💖

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I wish I could remember the other post/note about teddy bears as self-care. I comment on so many, they disappear from my 50 years old brain memory quickly. I"m sure it's logged in the archives somewhere...

I remember a panda teddy I had as a kid that was so soft and cuddly. I carried that thing with me everywhere for awhile. I think I'd want a panda.

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I love this and will share this article with my readers in my weekly roundup on Sunday. Thanks for the cuddly insights - I just subscribed.

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I'm thrilled you enjoyed it - the word is spreading. Each day I receive loving snippets from people sharing who they bought or now cuddle. How fab!

Thank you for sharing this at the weekend with your readers. I'm so grateful. And for subscribing! 🫶

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Jul 26Liked by Danusia Malina-Derben

I bought myself a little polar bear with brown eyes and a plush little butt like a baby in cloth diapers. I was newly in recovery, which dramatically changed the flavor of my marriage, and needed comforting while I grieved these losses. He sat in the passenger seat as we drove home. I looked at him and asked his name. In my head, I heard, “Well, you broke me out of the toy store, so now I’m a free man.”

Freeman has been my trusted confidant, for decades. A washing machine takes care of the tears and snot. He now lives with my younger son and his three year old daughter. I miss him. I think he grew a soul over the years, or maybe I did, in which case he gets co-author status.

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I think he grew a soul over the years, or maybe I did, in which case he gets co-author status”

Phyllis, I’ve only now found your tender words. You’re so funny too and I want to cry-laugh about Freeman.

And the most poignant part? When you say you miss him.

Would you consider getting another bear? Surely there’s a little space in your bed for a bundle of bear love?! 💞

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Jul 24Liked by Danusia Malina-Derben

Just grabbed myself a grey bunny plushy from my son’s cupboard that he’s never used. Now just got to wait for the little fella to tell me his name.

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I’m so hoping you’ll share the name ….when he’s ready.

All in good time. 💞

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Jul 23Liked by Danusia Malina-Derben

UUUUUM. Wow. There IS such a stigma around this for adults and I honestly probably would never even thought to try this, ever! Thank you so much for this DELIGHTFUL read, I am shooketh, and off to raid my daughter's stuffed animals (don't worry, I will not be taking her favorites!! Lol) 💕🙌

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High praise Megan. I'm thrilled you were shooketh. Fab state ✨✨✨

Now you have me wondering how you'll make your choice. Ha. xo

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Jul 24Liked by Danusia Malina-Derben

💛 I snagged a cuddly sloth stuffy! Fun fact: my child noticed 😅 And told me to get my OWN stuffed animal. Fair enough child, fair enough. 🤣💕

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Fair enough, for sure. I’m wondering what you’ll get for yourself! 💛

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Jul 21Liked by Danusia Malina-Derben

Love this! If you’re an animal lover you know this trick but never considered it self- care. We welcomed our new dog shortly after our last beloved dog passed. The main reason- my son who was dealing with a health issue at the time reported the benefits of having our dog- less stress, anxiety and better sleep!! I believed him but did t know the science behind it.

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Emotional therapy dogs are famed for regulating humans aren't they?! And ones who aren't trained specifically are in-built stress busters. Or at least some of them are!

Love that your son is so wise.

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Jul 21Liked by Danusia Malina-Derben

Absolutely. Our dogs have never been therapy or service dogs but they offer the same regulating benefits. The point being you don’t need a ‘trai ex’ therapy dog to enjoy the benefits. :))

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I read this while unconciously petting my hot water bottle, that is soft and warm and give me so much comfort. I imagine it counts too :)

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"unconsciously petting my hot water bottle" has to be one of my fave sentences...

It all counts my friend ❤️

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