13 Comments

I read your article a few days ago and paused—not in a bad way, but in a highly resonant way. However, I wasn't quite sure how to articulate myself. Here goes.

Before - at work in the early days as the young-looking Asian female, the potential poster child for DEI- I carefully picked my business/budget/leadership and HR battles. At the same time, I navigated an upward trajectory/ladder. I also capitalised on times when some people thought they knew better than me. Being the underdog and being 'underestimated' presents brilliant opportunities. I was blessed with insightful, seasoned and empowering mentors.

I've sat through sheep-nodding meetings, derogatory jokes and been told to have more gravitas or directive strong statements in a presentation.

There is the 'company line' 'the system' especially in corporations that can smother diversity BUT as you point out leaders, true leaders need to role model value-led leadership, diversity and deference to experts instead of the old pretending the person at the top knows everything - it's humanly impossible!

So now, may I offer, that I'd love us to completely redefine and role model leadership, in a similar way that Jim Collins says Level 5 leadership. So, that we don't use the old male terms and try to redefine what's already there, but paradigm shift, and disrupt definitions to non-gendered NEW good.

In the same way that essential skills were segmented out of business, these historically termed 'soft skills' are critical for agile business models, high-performance innovation, creativity, and lean production. I tell my mentoring clients this and help them walk this path.

Do we have to expend effort at changing the existing paradigm (or stubborn heads), or can we leap ahead with a different vision (as you've set out)? The role models already exist...

Long comment!! Does this resonate?

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Hi Lovely

I’ve taken a while to answer which isn’t how I like it! Here’s to late replies being as loving as fast ones 💞

I enjoyed hearing about you as that underestimated person - this is a hidden gift that can often be seen as a disadvantage. But no, it’s genius. You made me smile as you described your impact!

Everything you say resonates like a bell clanging - it’s that strong. Soft skills are human skills. To have them denigrated and devalued is inextricably linked to gendered perceptions of who embodies power and how it is deployed.

This not only harms women but cages men as these soft human skills are not readily seen as ones they express with professional rigour.

Thank you for your nuanced rich comment. I love your smart brain and how generous you are in sharing it! 🙏🏻💞⭐️

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Thanks, Danusia - I thought this would resonate but I also hoped that I didn't overstep with my soapbox moment there. I appreciate your badass enabling of women. Thanks for this, I know you've SOOOO much on your plate, I'll always check in tho ;-) Here's to shifting the narrative AND action around wholehearted leadership that's ALL inclusive and builds great talented leaders.

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Absolutely love the reframing of "badass" here! This whole "thoughtful badass" concept is inspiring. It's not about being cold or aggressive, but about believing in yourself and going after your dreams with kindness and strength.

The stories were great examples, especially Helen Packham refusing to let "no" stop her. The idea of embracing failure as part of the badass journey is powerful too.

This is definitely going to make me think about how I can be more badass in my own life. Thanks for sharing!

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Thanks ever so much for being here Ayesha!

Spot on - there’s no need to collapse Badass with negative traits. Combining soul centred qualities with badassery is something I believe in and know is possible. To be both a loving/kind/insert your word giant badass is a yes from me!

Helen and I recorded a podcast episode on her new show a couple of months ago. She’s chock full of chutzpah and is a wonderful person.

So glad me writing this is a badass injection for you. 💞

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You're welcome!

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Ps. I had to return to say vulnerability is the key to being a modern badass. It’s sat in the centre of why I used the word thoughtful. x

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Am so enjoying your articles. Just at the right moment too

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Thank you so much. It’s fab when the right things show up at the right moment 🥰

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I love this! ❤️ As a flamenco dancer for 20+ years, I was recently in class with my badass teacher and asked her how to access my inner badass. She was like, you're a DL badass, I can feel it. Look at your lipstick! Look at your nails!

Sometimes we just need to be reminded by a fellow badass that it's been there all along.

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There’s something about your words that made me smile. The situation, how badass is flamenco? The question. It’s pure badass. Your recognition of your teacher. Game recognises Game, right?!

And your punchline - all it takes is a reminder! You’re so right

Thanks for being here Sarah, badasses together 💃💃

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My body was going ‘fuck yes’ all the way through this. I love the question at the end, I’m feeling into it - where my badassery (lol to the ‘bad asset’ auto correct that just tried to slip through) is calling me more into it. Brilliant read x

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Ooh that auto correct is brilliant. Bad asset…what a naughty hex that is!

Your body will lead the way, right?! x

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