There’s a phrase women hear when we’re expected to pull ourselves together, shut up about the discomfort, and get on with it: Put on your big girl pants.
I’m DONE with the personal brand hamster wheel. Who I am isn’t for sale. I’m not a strategy. My value isn’t measured in engagement rates, and my worth isn’t tied to how “visible” I make myself. If my work is good, it stands. If my voice is strong, it carries.
I’m also DONE justifying my life choices, especially the one about having my ten glorious children. Enough with the side eyes. My choices don’t need a PR spin, a compelling backstory, or a neatly packaged explanation that makes them palatable. They are mine. That’s enough. 💥
I’m done with the male ways of working, showing up day in day out as if we’re not cyclical beings. It’s exhausting. It’s frustrating and I find it extremely limiting and exclusionary. Like only those who can show up every day can win, the rest is weak, not trustworthy and „too sensitive“ and „difficult“ 🤮 at least that’s what i heard last week when talking to a male colleague
YES to all of this. The expectation to show up like a machine—as if we don’t have rhythms, emotions, actual human limits—isn’t just exhausting, it’s bullshit.
And the way they frame it? “Weak.” “Too sensitive.” “Difficult.” Yeah, God forbid we don’t perform relentless, frictionless productivity on their terms. 🚮
Honestly? If not breaking yourself to fit that mould makes you "difficult," then let’s be impossible.🔥
I’m done with men. I’m done giving them all I have and leaving nothing for myself. I’m done being their emotional sponge, their iron clad support system, their endless yes. I am done.
Hell. Yes. 🔥 The emotional sponge, the iron-clad support system, the endless yes? That’s a full-time job with no salary, no benefits, and a burnout rate of 100%.
So if you’re done? Then you’re done. No explanation required, no permission needed. Just a hard reset and a full reclamation of YOU. 💥
I'm not sure I'm done with it just yet (!), but I am noticing that an expectation or pressure I feel is to be calm and Zen and wise in how I present myself to the world in my business.
When a lot of the time I am actually fired-up, passionate and angry about injustice and exploitation e.g. by the alcohol industry.
I want to come across as ME but there is a voice telling me I should be quieter, calmer, less intense, not 'too much' i.e. to be pleasant and palatable. I had a nickname at university: 'Ellie Pleasant', and I never even used to swear...(because good/nice girls don't swear). So I realise how much I am carrying from my upbringing and the shame that comes with being passionate and, yes, sometimes intense because some things are too fucking important to be quiet about!
YES, Ellie. This right here. 🔥 The pressure to be pleasant, palatable, and just Zen enough to keep everyone comfortable? It’s real. But if what you’re fired up about actually matters (and it clearly does), then why the hell should you shrink yourself to make it easier for others to digest?
Passion isn’t a flaw. Intensity isn’t a liability. And ‘too much’ is usually just enough. Keep going. Keep speaking. Keep swearing, even—because some things are too fucking important to be quiet about. 💥
Gosh do universe have a way to lead you to where you need to be when you’re ready as opposed to force you… had this saved through the sick madhouse I’ve lived for the past week and WOW, I was nodding along with every paragraph because I’ve lived with those big girl pants on for soon a decade (still all in the scheme of a lifetime but it feels like a lifetime got sucked out?!?!)
I’m DONE amputating my thoughts for the perceived safety of others - I’m allowed to have my bloody mind for myself!
I’m DONE feeling guilty and ashamed for verbalizing and prioritizing my needs - My family wont be happier with a depleted mother.
I’m DONE making myself do everything alone, I’m allowed to feel supported however I need in that moment.
I promised to go first, so here I am:
I’m DONE with the personal brand hamster wheel. Who I am isn’t for sale. I’m not a strategy. My value isn’t measured in engagement rates, and my worth isn’t tied to how “visible” I make myself. If my work is good, it stands. If my voice is strong, it carries.
I’m also DONE justifying my life choices, especially the one about having my ten glorious children. Enough with the side eyes. My choices don’t need a PR spin, a compelling backstory, or a neatly packaged explanation that makes them palatable. They are mine. That’s enough. 💥
This! 🔥
Yes yes yes 🙌❤️❤️❤️
I’m done with the male ways of working, showing up day in day out as if we’re not cyclical beings. It’s exhausting. It’s frustrating and I find it extremely limiting and exclusionary. Like only those who can show up every day can win, the rest is weak, not trustworthy and „too sensitive“ and „difficult“ 🤮 at least that’s what i heard last week when talking to a male colleague
YES to all of this. The expectation to show up like a machine—as if we don’t have rhythms, emotions, actual human limits—isn’t just exhausting, it’s bullshit.
And the way they frame it? “Weak.” “Too sensitive.” “Difficult.” Yeah, God forbid we don’t perform relentless, frictionless productivity on their terms. 🚮
Honestly? If not breaking yourself to fit that mould makes you "difficult," then let’s be impossible.🔥
I’m done with men. I’m done giving them all I have and leaving nothing for myself. I’m done being their emotional sponge, their iron clad support system, their endless yes. I am done.
Hell. Yes. 🔥 The emotional sponge, the iron-clad support system, the endless yes? That’s a full-time job with no salary, no benefits, and a burnout rate of 100%.
So if you’re done? Then you’re done. No explanation required, no permission needed. Just a hard reset and a full reclamation of YOU. 💥
Amen 🙏🏻
I'm not sure I'm done with it just yet (!), but I am noticing that an expectation or pressure I feel is to be calm and Zen and wise in how I present myself to the world in my business.
When a lot of the time I am actually fired-up, passionate and angry about injustice and exploitation e.g. by the alcohol industry.
I want to come across as ME but there is a voice telling me I should be quieter, calmer, less intense, not 'too much' i.e. to be pleasant and palatable. I had a nickname at university: 'Ellie Pleasant', and I never even used to swear...(because good/nice girls don't swear). So I realise how much I am carrying from my upbringing and the shame that comes with being passionate and, yes, sometimes intense because some things are too fucking important to be quiet about!
YES, Ellie. This right here. 🔥 The pressure to be pleasant, palatable, and just Zen enough to keep everyone comfortable? It’s real. But if what you’re fired up about actually matters (and it clearly does), then why the hell should you shrink yourself to make it easier for others to digest?
Passion isn’t a flaw. Intensity isn’t a liability. And ‘too much’ is usually just enough. Keep going. Keep speaking. Keep swearing, even—because some things are too fucking important to be quiet about. 💥
Yes! Thanks Danusia 🔥
Gosh do universe have a way to lead you to where you need to be when you’re ready as opposed to force you… had this saved through the sick madhouse I’ve lived for the past week and WOW, I was nodding along with every paragraph because I’ve lived with those big girl pants on for soon a decade (still all in the scheme of a lifetime but it feels like a lifetime got sucked out?!?!)
I’m DONE amputating my thoughts for the perceived safety of others - I’m allowed to have my bloody mind for myself!
I’m DONE feeling guilty and ashamed for verbalizing and prioritizing my needs - My family wont be happier with a depleted mother.
I’m DONE making myself do everything alone, I’m allowed to feel supported however I need in that moment.
This was truly fire 🔥