Parents that Write #2: Shmuel Chaim Naiman
MAGIC: may this column tickle your creative compassion
Welcome to my weekly interview column.
When conversation turns to parent creatives - writers and artists, especially mothers - the focus often shifts to the chaos and supposed impossibility of juggling creativity with parenthood.
—> Let’s CUT THE NOISE:
Parents publish books, drop albums, get screenplays optioned, and pour their souls into poems every single day.
How do they do it? That’s what we’re here to uncover.
I’m delighted to showcase talented parent-writers and creators as they answer eight bite-size questions, plus a few more they pick from a juicy list I send their way.
But before we meet today’s guest, here’s a peek behind the scenes of my own creative life.
No-Fluff Notes from my Writing Life
Last week, I shared how I packed up the kids and drove us to a tiny, secluded island – the very one where JM Barrie wrote Peter Pan. A real-life slice of literary history.
I pictured my brood living out a Swallows and Amazons adventure – wild days in the sun, hikes to sandy shores, and nights of board games before drifting off with smiles still on our faces.
But my writing world was in panic mode. Two publishers were circling my motherhood book, just a juicy proposal yet nowhere near where I wanted it to be.
I needed uninterrupted time to write key chapters and figure out what I really wanted – a decent deal or the freedom to let my voice run free.
Instead, reality hit hard.
Two weeks without screens for the littles, and patchy access for the teens to their social media lifelines, sounded idyllic but quickly turned into a moody mess. The younger ones needed constant entertainment supervision, and the older ones, instead of thriving, pined for their digital connections. And they weren’t chomping at the bit to chase after their triplet siblings for more than half an hour at a time.
With kids’ needs clashing (think hormones, disabilities, and sibling squabbles) and no way to use our usual coping strategies, it became clear my writing had to take a backseat.
The only option? Surrender to the moment and make the most of it.
Our days filled with crabbing competitions, tiny explorations, and baking whatever we could muster. The weekly supply-run to the mainland became our mission.
Then, on day five, magic happened.
In fleeting moments, I found myself scribbling imperfect words at the kitchen table, snatching seconds between frying sausages in the damp air and helping a teen find the best spot for a signal in the Village Hall.
We all started to loosen our grip on routines.
The kids began to expect less from me and more from themselves. The older ones buried their noses in books and launched impromptu card tournaments. The allure of social media faded, replaced by the thrill of the island.
Evenings were spent swapping stories of scraped knees and crab hauls, followed by tick checks that were surprisingly intimate.
And slowly, the words began to flow. Decisions took shape!
Can’t wait to share more behind-the-scenes of my creative journey in next week’s column – hope to see you here!
Today’s guest is Shmuel Chaim Naiman, who writes The Healthy Jew Substack - this focuses on Jewish wellness, blending spirituality, science, and storytelling, with a particular emphasis on the natural world of Israel. The publication explores various aspects of living a healthy Jewish life, offering insights into traditional practices and their relevance today, all while avoiding political discussion. Schmuel’s approach draws on Jewish teachings and modern science to create a holistic understanding of health that is deeply connected to spirituality and nature.
Share a broad snapshot of your life. Who are you parent to and/or have caring responsibilities for?
I'm a parent to Avital (9 year old girl), Eitan (2 year old boy), and Achiya (5 month boy). My wife, Tamar, has been on extended maternity leave, then she returned to nursing shifts. (That's scary for me, because then I get the kids out alone and pick them up.)
I'm a Torah student, health teacher, and foraging guide, which means that I'm always gratefully busy. I practice all 3 of these vocations in the local yeshiva for gap-year students where I teach my daily Healthy Jew class.
We live in Israel, and yes, like everyone else here, know people who lost family and friends on October 7 2023.
Where can we find you?
Can you share favourite praise for your writing, or words you’d love to read about your work?
“Rabbi Naiman masterfully shows how every aspect of the physical Land of Israel expresses profound spiritual concepts — and teaches how to live within it. This book is filled with intriguing insights as well as practical suggestions for healthy living even under the most challenging conditions." —Miriam Kosman, Author of Circle, Arrow and Spiral: Exploring Gender in Judaism
Why do you write?
1. I deeply enjoy writing.
2. Writing is my partner in forming and organizing my ideas.
What does the inside of your writing mind look like?
No clue.
How is your ability to write affected by being a parent and your ability to parent affected by your writing?
Sometimes I'll write with a kid on my lap, which is either lovely or annoying. But truth is that writing with the kids doesn't usually work, because I need to be able to concentrate with no distractions. Other than that, not too much, except that kids greatly enrich life which means more and better things to write about, of course.
How often do you write with your children around or not, and what kind of writing do you get done when your child/ren are nearby?
Whoops, answered that in the last question.
What is your best writing habit and how did you discover it?
After mastering the basic rules, good writing is all about style. The way I write with good style is by forgetting about style and focusing on content, coherence, and conciseness. Learned this the hard way, like most things in my life.
What are the three most important characteristics of being a writer who is a parent?
1. Both take lots of time that isn't defined by hours, so doing both well means lots of letting go of expectations and checking priorities.
2. Making mistakes in writing and parenting - and learning from them.
3. Can't think of another one.
What or who is your secret writing weapon?
Write it terribly, but write it. You can always fix it later.
What or who has been the most significant creative influence in your life?
My mentors who've taught me to listen to Torah and life.
What are your coping tactics for being (constantly) interrupted in your thought process?
Getting extremely agitated and frustrated, then giving up and going to social media to do "really important work" that leaves me more agitated and frustrated.
What’s your best writing time?
Whenever it's quiet and I'm in the mood. I'm an unstable soul, so hard to give a time.
You’re a writer: name 3 of your procrastination techniques.
I'm obsessed so I don't procrastinate.
Do you use any productivity hacks like toggling, Pomodoro, Focusmate? Spill the beans.
Guess not, because no clue what those are. I used Microsoft Word for many years, but recently had enough of their backwardness and moved to Apple Pages which has greatly improved the quality of my life.
What unfinished writing projects do you have lying about?
A book (or series?) on the theory, application, and morality of punishments in Judaism. Another book on the agriculture in Jewish law. Another book on the Talmudic tractate about Jewish court systems. And more.
If you could have a conversation with any writer throughout history (who was also a parent) about their writing routine and creative process, who would that person be, and why?
Maimonides, because it's unfathomable to me how he wrote so much with such precision. I spend weeks working through a fraction of a percent of his work; how did he manage to create it from scratch?
What is the favourite sentence you’ve ever written, and why?
"Take your health seriously - not only to make good living possible, but because caring for ourselves is where all good choices begin." That's kinda everything I write about at The Healthy Jew.
What music do you listen to while writing?
None at all.
An Encore
“We know that a manifesto, a book, even a well-turned, well-timed phrase can change the world. Writers are at times, as Pope decried, fools in dunce’s caps. But they can also be magicians, conjuring other worlds, brave new possibilities.” -- David Wood
How often do you write with your children around you or nearby? What hit home for you in this column today?
Maybe you have a question for Schmuel? Drop them in the comments below. Let’s chat!
I relate to this line so much about best writing time: "Whenever it's quiet and I'm in the mood. I'm an unstable soul, so hard to give a time."
It makes it a challenge with children!
I really enjoyed reading this. As someone who has worked with Shmuel, it was nice to catch a glimpse into his other more personal side. That photo with his child sleeping over his laptop is PRICELESS!!
Shmuel, I'm just like you in the way that I need complete silence and no distraction to be able to write.
Thank you both for sharing this.